Below are are few excerpts from my paper on the symbiotic period between the birthing parent and child during the first 6-8 weeks of life. This is a very important period that is mutually beneficial and we as a society have the responsibility to support this special bonding experience. After a positive symbiotic period, the baby gains trust in the world and recognizes it as a place where their needs can be met and solutions can be found.
When a baby is born, they come into a new environment that offers new experiences and a different relationship with the mother. During the first 6-8 weeks of life, the newborn and mother experience a symbiotic period that is mutually beneficial. The newborn forms an attachment to the mother that establishes the foundation for future relationships and trust in their new environment so that they can begin to interact with it confidently. Through breastfeeding, the mother’s uterus shrinks back to its normal size. By holding the baby, the mother can start to accept the emptiness of her body after birth and guide the baby’s exploration of the environment. At the end of the symbiotic period, the baby has acquired knowledge and trust of the environment that will shape their view of the world.
Mother
The increase and fluctuation of hormones influence the mother’s behavior and day to day functioning. These hormonal shifts can cause sleep deprivation, depression, and anxiety. During pregnancy, the women’s body goes through many changes including an increase in size then there is a sudden abdominal loss in her body after birth. Along with this, there is societal pressure to return to a pre-pregnant body weight and size after birth. Birthing parents need support during this period and time to bond with their baby as they both need to orient themselves to this new life. The mother should not be separated from the baby after birth since they are both expecting a contact to continue to live happily and fulfill their expectations of this new stage. The baby needs to feel reassurance in the mother’s arms and the mother needs to hold the newborn to compensate for the sudden loss of what was in her body. The baby grew gradually inside of her and went away very quickly during birth. The feeling of emptiness is both physical and psychological. The mother needs to stay with the child for both to feel secure.
Baby
During the symbiotic period, the baby achieves body and mind integration and gains knowledge about their environment. Positive experiences during the first 6-8 weeks of life produce in the baby the idea that this new world is a safe place. If they feel safe in their new world, they come to trust it and rely on it because their needs have been met. The child is secure to be away from the mother for short periods of time. Basic trust in the environment means that the child will perceive the world around them as a good place and strive for positive solutions. The relationship of the mother and child has progressed and now both have more freedom. To aid in achieving basic trust, the mother must be prepared for the period after symbiosis and accept that the child needs to detach. If there are negative feelings toward this transition, then the previous stage will be preferred. It is the role of the adult to provide for the needs of the child without being overly responsive so that they feel secure and optimistic about the world.
The sensory experiences of attaching to the breast provide a body-mind knowledge that builds a fundamental relationship between the mother and child. This relationship feeds on what the child receives through the senses and penetrates the body and mind. The act of breast feeding is the foundation for social life as mother and child establish a bond from the beginning. The child gains much more than food during this time, they smell the mother and feel her arms and warmth of the body. This relationship gives the baby a sense of how nice life can be and that there is joy in human relationship. The child must remain attached to the breast until they release the nipple. This indicates the effort of feeding is finished and they have reached complete satisfaction. To feed, the child should be awake and ready to feed because the milk will only be appreciated when it is truly needed. If adults respond to every request with food, then food may become a source of gratification in itself and lose its potential for social life. This can start a negative pattern of relationship with the environment. Adults must observe to recognize when the baby is requesting food.
Father
A father is a person who has love and patience to dedicate to a child’s life. The father plays an equally important role as the mother in the child’s life. If the relationship between the couple is loving and harmonious, the relationship with the child will also be loving and not filled with possessiveness. If the relationship is loving and supportive, the parents will not try to compensate for what they lack emotionally in their relationship with the child. The collaboration of the father is needed for the child to realize more of their potentialities. Both partners must work together to protect their child and prepare an environment for them to acquire human characteristics and reach their full potential.
With the protective barrier of the father, symbiotic life becomes a more positive experience for the child and further forms their basic trust in the world. However, protecting the relationship of mother and child is not the father’s only work. The father can offer many sensory experiences to enrich the child’s life. The father can participate in routines like a daily bath, holding, talking, and singing to the baby. Skin contact with the child is important in establishing a relationship.